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Waitress Tip Quotes

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Waitress Tip Quotes

“That waitress was flirting with me," Dad announced once we were out of the restaurant. He said it in his "whispering voice," which meant it was still loud enough for the waitress, all of her coworkers, and the shoppers at every other store in the mall to overhear. "Ew," I said. "She was not." Dad chuckled with delight over how hot and eligible he imagined himself to be. "She kept coming over to try to collect my plate ... " "Because that is her job," I reminded him. "And the way she looked at your mother? Pure jealousy!" Dad slipped his arm around Moms waist. "Poor thing. I left her a big tip.”
— Leila Sales —

“My stand-up has always been very character-based. I'm not really the kind of person that's like, 'Hey, here's what's on my mind! Tip your waitress!' I would create the jokes based on the character I was playing. It was always a performance-based thing for me.”

— Mary Lynn Rajskub

“That waitress was flirting with me," Dad announced once we were out of the restaurant. He said it in his "whispering voice," which meant it was still loud enough for the waitress, all of her coworkers, and the shoppers at every other store in the mall to overhear.
"Ew," I said. "She was not."
Dad chuckled with delight over how hot and eligible he imagined himself to be. "She kept coming over to 'try to collect my plate' ... "
"Because that is her job," I reminded him.
"And the way she looked at your mother? Pure jealousy!" Dad slipped his arm around Mom's waist. "Poor thing. I left her a big tip.”

— Leila Sales

“Look, I realize both of you could happily strangle each other across the table, but I don't think that's the most effective use of our time, and frankly, I don't think I have enough money to tip the waitress for that kind of clean-up. And look, here's lunch. Let's eat that instead of eachother.”

— Maggie Stiefvater

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