Reading With Baby Quotes

“I hate babies with trendy names like Tiffany and Britney and Heather and Noah and Blake and Justin. I'm sick of Olivia and Chloe and Eva and Madison. I hope Aiden and Jayden and Braden and Graden all suffer minor head injuries while reading Dr. Seuss. Enough already with the cutesy-poo baby names. What happened to John and Dave and Sue? Babies with trendy names grow up to be adults with ridiculous names. "This is our CEO, Micah." "You know what, Micah? I want my money back. I'm closing my portfolio. I'm going with Michael. He's a grown-up." One day all of these trendy-named children will grow up and become parents and then grandparents, and it's all wrong. Grandma Tori? Zayda Jared? Nana Savannah?”

— Joan Rivers

“She says I shall now have one mouth the more to fill and two feet the more to shoe, more disturbed nights, more laborious days, and less leisure or visiting, reading, music, and drawing.
Well! This is one side of the story, to be sure, but I look at the other. Here is a sweet, fragrant mouth to kiss; here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery. Here is a soul to train for God; and the body in which it dwells is worth all it will cost, since it is the abode of a kingly tenant. I may see less of friends, but I have gained one dearer than them all, to whom, while I minister in Christ's name, I make a willing sacrifice of what little leisure for my own recreation my other darlings had left me. Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mother's heart, welcome to her time, her strength, her health, her tenderest cares, to her lifelong prayers! Oh, how rich I am, how truly, how wondrously blest!”

— Elizabeth Payson Prentiss

“What's wrong with your father? Huh? Can't he do this? Or have you been reading Freud? WARD, have you been reading the baby Freud?”

— Benjamin R. Smith

“Get your butt over there and start reading before I beat you with my Rod of Time. (Sin)
I can think of much better things to do with your rod than beat me, baby. (Kat)
Aww, gawd, we've degenerated into really bad punage. I yield. Save me before my IQ points are damaged. (Sin)”

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

“I love you, Half-Pint. Love that little baby. You understand where I'm at with all of that?" ( ... ) "I know you aren't on the same page as me just yet, Cora, and for right now I'm happy enough we're reading the same book. Eventually you have to turn the page, though, you got me?”

— Jay Crownover

“Where the techno-medical model of birth reigns, women who give birth vaginally generally labor in bed hooked up to electronic fetal monitors, intravenous tubes, and pressure-reading devices. Eating and drinking in labor are usually not permitted. Labor pain within this model is seen as unacceptable, so analgesia, and anesthesia are encouraged. Episiotomies (the surgical cut to enlarge the vaginal opening) are routinely performed, out of a belief that birth over an intact perineum would be impossible or that, if possible, it might be harmful to mother or baby. Instead of being the central actor of the birth drama, the woman becomes a passive, almost inert object - representing a barrier to the baby's eventual passage to the outside world. Women are treated as a homogenous group within the medical model, with individual variations receding in importance.”

— Ina May Gaskin

“I once wrote on my MySpace profile that music is never authentic. It was a reaction to constantly reading the word 'authentic' in connection with bands. But what does that mean? A baby crying after being pushed out of its mother's womb, now that's what I'd call authentic.”

— Sophie Hunger

“I usually doze off between 7:30 and 9 p.m. while putting my baby to sleep. Then I suddenly wake up remembering I'm an adult with no bedtime. I spend the next four hours catching up on reading, e-mails, and other adult pursuits until I collapse for good until sunrise.”

— Padma Lakshmi

“When I was pregnant, I had the romantic idea that after the baby was born I would not only take up reading in earnest again, but also write a novel while my daughter slept in her Moses basket. Of course, I barely had time to keep up with my magazines until she started sleeping properly.”

— Kate Beckinsale

“At first, I thought it was because I was raised with all this Chinese humility ... Or maybe it was because when you're Chinese you're supposed to accept everything, flow with the Tao and not make waves. But my therapist said, Why do you blamd your culture, your ethnicity? And I remembered reading an article about baby boomers, how we expect the best and when we get it we worry that maybe we shoudl have expected more, because it's all diminishing returns after a certain age.”

— Amy Tan

“I don't believe in 'thinking' old. Although I've transitioned through many bodies - a baby, toddler, child, teen, young adult, mid-life and older adult - my spirit is unchanged. I support my body with exercise, my mind with reading and writing, and my spirit with the knowing that I am part of the Divine source of all life.”

— Wayne Dyer

“You know the story in the Bible?', Jacob asked suddenly, still reading the blank ceiling. 'The one with the king and the two women fighting over the baby?'
'Sure. King Solomon.'
'That's right. King Solomon.' he repeated. 'And he said, cut the kid in half ... but it was only a test. Just to see who would give-up their share to protect it.'
'Yeah. I remember.'
He looked back at my face. 'I'm not going to cut you in half anymore, Bella.”

— Stephenie Meyer