Quotes About Turkey On Thanksgiving

“You think you have a handle on God, the Universe, and the Great White Light until you go home for Thanksgiving. In an hour, you realize how far you've got to go and who is the real turkey.”

— Shirley Maclaine

“Consider a turkey that is fed every day. Every single feeding will firm up the bird's belief that it is the general rule of life to be fed every day by friendly members of the human race "looking out for its best interests," as a politician would say. On the afternoon of the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, something unexpected will happen to the turkey. It will incur a revision of belief.”

— Peter Morville

“If secrets were stuffing, the woman would be done up like a Thanksgiving turkey.”

— Lauren Oliver

“The parishioners looked dazed, but happy. The only thing good Catholics love more than God is a short service. Keep your organ music, your choir, keep your incense and processionals. Give us a priest with one eye on the Bible and the other on the clock, and we'll pack the place like it's a turkey raffle the week before Thanksgiving.”

— Dennis Lehane

“Eating Animals closes with a turkey-less Thanksgiving. As a holiday, it doesn't sound like a lot of fun. But this is Foer's point. We are, he suggests, defined not just by what we do; we are defined by what we are willing to do without. Vegetarianism requires the renunciation of real and irreplaceable pleasures. To Foer's credit, he is not embarrassed to ask this of us.”

— Elizabeth Kolbert

“And it was never but once a year that they were brought together anyway, and that was on the neutral, dereligionized ground of Thanksgiving, when everybody gets to eat the same thing, nobody sneaking off to eat funny stuff
no kugel, no gefilte fish, no bitter herbs, just one colossal turkey for two hundred and fifty million people
one colossal turkey feeds all. A moratorium on the three-thousand-year-old nostalgia of the Jews, a moratorium on Christ and the cross and the crucifixion of the Christians, when everyone in New Jersey and elsewhere can be more passive about their irrationalities than they are the rest of the year. A moratorium on all the grievances and resentments, and not only for the Dwyers and the Levovs but for everyone in America who is suspicious of everyone else. It is the American pastoral par excellence and it lasts twenty-four hours.”

— Philip Roth

“Thank God for YouTube. Every Thanksgiving, I'm bombarded with 'Turkey Lurkey Time.'”

— Donna McKechnie

“After the meal was done, the brothers moved slowly, as if drugged or sleepy, which made me wonder if it was similar to the post-turkey feeling on Thanksgiving Day.”

— Colleen Houck

“Holiday binge-buying has deep roots in American culture: department stores have been associating turkey gluttony with its spending equivalent since they began sponsoring Thanksgiving Day parades in the early 20th century.”

— Adam Davidson

“The truth is the Super Bowl long ago became more than just a football game. It's part of our culture like turkey at Thanksgiving and lights at Christmas, and like those holidays beyond their meaning, a factor in our economy.”

— Bob Schieffer

“I'm vegetarian, but I love Thanksgiving dinner: faux turkey, stuffing and mashed potatoes.”

— Leigh Lezark

“My favorite meal is turkey and mashed potatoes. I love Thanksgiving, it's just my favorite. I can have Thanksgiving all year round.”

— Cindy Margolis

“I have nothing against turkey. We eat turkey for Thanksgiving in my house.”

— Marc Forgione

“I'd love to give my girls a traditional Thanksgiving with turkey and all that jazz, but we've raised them to love Tuscan food so much that they don't care for it. My favorite is a nice polenta with beef stew and broccoli rabe on the side.”

— Debi Mazar

“My most memorable meal is every Thanksgiving. I love the food: the turkey and stuffing; the sweet potatoes and rice, which come from my mother's Southern heritage; the mashed potatoes, which come from my wife's Midwestern roots; the Campbell's green-bean casserole; and of course, pumpkin pie.”

— Douglas Conant

“In deference to American traditions, my family put our oven to rare use at Thanksgiving during my childhood, with odd roast-turkey experiments involving sticky-rice stuffing or newfangled basting techniques that we read about in magazines.”

— Jennifer Lee

“I was introduced to the Turducken in New Orleans. And it wasn't Thanksgiving. Glenn at the Gourmet Butcher Block brought it by, and I had never heard of it or had seen one, and they put it in the booth, and it smelled so good that I had to taste it. And it was good. Then Thanksgiving came, and we got one in addition to the traditional turkey.”

— John Madden

“What a marvelous resource soup is for the thrifty cook - it solves the ham-bone and lamb-bone problems, the everlasting Thanksgiving turkey, the extra vegetables.”

— Julia Child

“I started acting in second grade - my first role was in the Thanksgiving play. I was the Indian chasing the turkey. All the other mom's encouraged my mom to get me into acting after that. Also, when I saw 'The Sound of Music' at Music Circus, I knew I wanted to act.”

— Brie Larson

“I'm not a big turkey fan, but my husband loves it. Thanksgiving is his favorite meal.”

— Ruth Reichl

“I am going to host Thanksgiving myself and instead of a turkey I'm serving a big human butt.”

— Aimee Bender

“Thanksgiving turkey in the world.”

— James Patterson

“T hanks for time to be together, turkey, talk, and tangy weather.
H for harvest stored away, home, and hearth, and holiday.
A for autumn's frosty art, and abundance in the heart.
N for neighbors, and November, nice things, new things to remember.
K for kitchen, kettles' croon, kith and kin expected soon.
S for sizzles, sights, and sounds, and something special that about.
That spells THANKS for joy in living and a jolly good Thanksgiving.”

— Aileen Fisher

“It has been an unchallengeable American doctrine that cranberry sauce, a pink goo with overtones of sugared tomatoes, is a delectable necessity of the Thanksgiving board and that turkey is uneatable without it.”

— Alistair Cooke

“Boy meets girl. Boy marries girl. Boy and girl angst over which family they visit at Thanksgiving and which one in December and whether or not it's best to serve turkey or goose for the family feast. When first faced with the reality that the family you married into does things differently, the warmth of tradition can take on a chill.”

— Margaret Kennedy

“May your stuffing be tasty May your turkey plump, May your potatoes and gravy Have nary a lump. May your yams be delicious And your pies take the prize, And may your Thanksgiving dinner Stay off your thighs!”

— Grandpa Jones

“Coexistence: what the farmer does with the turkey - until Thanksgiving.”

— Mike Connolly

“The arrogance of the young is a direct result of not having known enough consequences. The turkey that every day greedily approaches the farmer who tosses him grain is not wrong. It is just that no one ever told him about Thanksgiving.”

— Harry Golden

“Detente - isn't that what a farmer has with his turkey - until Thanksgiving?”

— Ronald Reagan

“When I was a kid in Indiana, we thought it would be fun to get a turkey a year ahead of time and feed it and so on for the following Thanksgiving. But by the time Thanksgiving came around, we sort of thought of the turkey as a pet, so we ate the dog. Only kidding. It was the cat!”

— David Letterman

“Radical historians now the tell the story of Thanksgiving from the point of view of the turkey.”

— Mason Cooley

“I love Thanksgiving turkey ... It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.”

— Arnold Schwarzenegger

“I really like Thanksgiving turkey ... it does not take only time in Houston that you look at natural breasts.”

— Arnold Schwarzenegger

“Here's a Thanksgiving tip. Generally, your turkey is not cooked enough if it passes you the cranberry sauce.”

— Joan Rivers

“And so, Thanksgiving. Its the most amazing holiday. Just think about it - it's a miracle that once a year so many millions of Americans sit down to exactly the same meal as one another, exactly the same meal they grew up eating, and exactly the same meal they ate a year earlier. The turkey. The sweet potatoes. The stuffing. The pumpkin pie. Is there anything else we all can agree so vehemently about? I don't think so.”

— Nora Ephron

“Any woman who votes for no-fault divorce is like a turkey voting for Thanksgiving.”

— Pat Robertson

“We're having a traditional Thanksgiving - turkey, mashed potatoes, hat buckles, smallpox, genocide, a blue corn moon, etc.”

— Bo Burnham

“A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry-that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.”

— Johnny Carson

“We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing”

— George Carlin

“Love iz a big fat turkey and every day iz thanksgiving”

— Charles Bukowski

“I love to eat. That's why I got so fat; I love to eat. If I don't walk away from a meal hurting, I didn't do it right. If I don't walk away from Thanksgiving dinner feeling like I've been turkey-f**ked in a gingerbread prison, I didn't do it right.”

— Greg Behrendt

“'I'm sorry,' guys are always telling women, 'but I'm just not ready to make a commitment.' Guys are in a permanent state of nonreadiness. If guys were turkey breasts, you could put them in a 350-degree oven on July Fourth, and they still wouldn't be done in time for Thanksgiving.”

— Dave Barry