Quotes About Status On Facebook

“Because while we all Facebook stalk, protocol is to not admit it. I might know, from status update, that a potential best friend swims laps every mornings, but it'd be creep to say "Don't worry about eating that doughnut, you deserve it after all those calories you burn!" Instead, I check out her profile and she reviews mine, but then we meet and pretend to know nothing.”

— Rachel Bertsche

“You don't have to like me, I'm not a Facebook status.”

— Wiz Khalifa

“As for human contact, I'd lost all appetite for it. Mankind has, as you may have noticed, become very inventive about devising new ways for people to avoid talking to each other and I'd been taking full advantage of the most recent ones. I would always send a text message rather than speak to someone on the phone. Rather than meeting with any of my friends, I would post cheerful, ironically worded status updates on Facebook, to show them all what a busy life I was leading. And presumably people had been enjoying them, because I'd got more than seventy friends on Facebook now, most of them complete strangers. But actual, face-to-face, let's-meet-for-a-coffee-and-catch-up sort of contact? I seemed to have forgotten what that was all about.”

— Jonathan Coe

“Julie swallowed. "Flat Finn is on Facebook?" She'd love to see those status updates. 'Got strapped to the roof of the car today for a trip to Starbucks. Would have loved to taste caramel mocha, but can't move arms and so was forced to stare longingly at delicious hot beverage. Will the taunting never end?”

— Jessica Park

“It amazes me that we are all on Twitter and Facebook. By "we" I mean adults. We're adults, right? But emotionally we're a culture of seven-year-olds. Have you ever had that moment when are you updating your status and you realize that every status update is just a variation on a single request: "Would someone please acknowledge me?”

— Marc Maron

“Lu Googles "Jonnie Forke"-nothing. Literally, nothing, which is bizarrely impressive. She plugs "Jonnie Forke" in Facebook, finds an entry for Juanita Forke. Graduated Centennial High School. No overlap with Drysdale there. Relationship status, single. She has only seventy-four friends, so she's one of those people who actually uses Facebook for friends, yet doesn't think to opt for the highest-security settings. To be fair, the site changes its privacy policy so often, some well-intentioned people don't realize their fences are down. Lu”

— Laura Lippman

“Poetry is not difficult. If you possess one of the five senses, poetry is in it. If you can compose text message, tweet or Facebook status, you can write poetry. If you can rap a song, you can rhyme poetry. If you can memorise a prayer, you can recite poetry. If you struggle to make sense of formatted text, poetry is your call.”

— Gloria D. Gonsalves

“I envied many for being happy, successful and content. I wondered how a sick friend managed to look resplendent in her profile picture?
How someone with a dark past post hilarious Facebook status? Until one day ... I realised that while they all were making a conscious effort to grow in life, I simply sat and worshipped the grave of my sufferings.
I sat at one place and did nothing but moan. So, I stopped. I don't dig graves anymore as I am too busy building my empire.”

— Saru Singhal

“You cannot let anyone know what you are."
"Gee. Really? I was thinking about updating my Facebook to halfling status."
He cocked his blondish-white head to the side. "You don't have a Facebook, Ivy."
I sighed.
Tink continued, because of course. "I looked for you. Wanted to add you as my friend so I could poke you, and I know people don't poke anymore, but I think poking is a great way to express how one-”

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

“If you'd like to keep CHRIST in Christmas this year, I'd humbly suggest that instead of just posting about it as a status on Facebook, that perhaps you try to find a family in your neighborhood who could use a little help or pehaps donate to a local food bank anonomously. That's keeping CHRIST in Christmas!”

— José N. Harris

“Sometimes I'll write a tweet that I'll just be like, 'Why do I have to say this to all of these people?' It's like writing a Facebook status: it's the same. I view tweeting as like writing a Facebook status. Remember when we used to write statuses?”

— Ansel Elgort

“Who doesn't want to shoot for 'Vogue?' I remember updating my Facebook status to say 'Doing 'Vogue' today', it was so exciting. I thought it would be really intimidating, and I don't like photoshoots, but that was the most relaxed one I've done.”

— Kaya Scodelario

“Were they dating? Sort of. Exclusive? Not as far as she knew ... Discovering new feelings was one thing. Actually changing your Facebook status? That was real.
Savannah”

— Katy Regnery

“Discovering new feelings was one thing. Actually changing your Facebook status? That was real. To”

— Katy Regnery

“People are hungry for climate action that does more than asks you to send emails to your climate-denying congressperson or update your Facebook status with some clever message about fossil fuels. Now, a new antiestablishment movement has broken with Washington's embedded elites and has energized a new generation to stand in front of the bulldozers and coal trucks.”

— Anonymous.

“If I were to run for president, then people would debate the pros and cons of what's wrong with me in increasingly aggressive 140 character tweets and Facebook status updates, and, inevitably, everyone would end up fighting.”

— Jen Lancaster

“We know everything about what you know and how you learn best because we get so much data. And education is the highest-stakes media product in your life. It's infinitely more important than your Facebook friends' status updates or your Google search results because it's your future.”

— Jose Ferreira

“Startups need to focus on building a foundation for their company culture early, and then they need to revisit it often. Every time a hire is made, a feature is launched, a Facebook status is updated, a press interview is given, a round of financing is raised, or a meeting is held, culture should be part of the decision-making process.”

— Leah Busque

“Aaron Sorkin was completely unable to understand the actual psychology of Mark or of Facebook. He can't conceive of a world where social status or getting laid or, for that matter, doing drugs, is not the most important thing.”

— Marc Andreessen

“The problem with people today, is, they have religions but they have no spirituality. They go to church but they cannot even manage the condition of their own souls. They take pride to state the name of their religions and broadcast these things on facebook and everywhere, thinking that the nature of their religion represents the nature of their spirit. It's just the same as how they present their cars, houses, and degrees to the world- to stand as a representation of what they are. That's not spirituality; that's still materialism. Yes, perhaps your car, house and degree represents what you've achieved (or what your status in society is); but your religion does not represent what your spirit is like. You cannot go to a certain church or belong to a certain group of people and have that be a replica of your spirit.”

— C. JoyBell C.

“There's a new Facebook app that will post a final status update for you after you die. That's ridiculous. I don't need someone to change my status when I die. I need them to water my Farmville crops.”

— Jimmy Fallon

“You read about that Black Lips/Wavves fight as a spectator and you're like, "Oh man, I'm gonna pick a team to be on! I'm gonna put my two cents in as my status update on my Facebook page" or something. Not to sound like an anti-technology person, but it's just a real drag that people live their lives that way.”

— Bradford Cox

“Why do people deserve a penny when they update their Facebook status? Because they'll spend some of it on you.”

— Jaron Lanier

“A man in Georgia was arrested for burglary after he left his Facebook account open on the victim's computer. But this is nice: He's only been in jail a few hours, and his status already says In a Relationship!”

— Jimmy Fallon

“I'm not a facebook status you don't have to like me.”

— Wiz Khalifa