Answer Your Phone Quotes

“He buys Playboy magazines and looks through them once, then gives them to me. That's what it's like to be rich.
Here's what it's like to be poor. Your wife leaves you because you can't find a job because there aren't any jobs to find. You empty the jar of pennies on the mantel to buy cigarettes. You hate to answer the phone; it can't possibly be good news. When your friends invite you out, you don't go. After a while, they stop inviting. You owe them money, and sometimes they ask for it. You tell them you'll see what you can scrape up.
Which is this: nothing.”

— Tom Franklin

“I mean am I crazy or is it a little rude to answer your phone in the middle of a fucking song?
February 13, 2008. Milan Blood Ball”

— Jared Leto

“That's because it is stupid, Maddie. And that's not even the worst of it. Did you ever consider that maybe you aren't the center of the world? That maybe, just maybe, I have crap going on, too? Crap that I should be able to talk to my best friend about? But have I been able to talk to you about it? No, because you won't answer your phone or return my calls. Because apparently, you've been off committing social suicide by dumping Eric. I mean, who does junk like that? Only you, Maddie, only you.”

— Leah Rae Miller

“When you chronically interrupt your time with whom ever you're with to answer your phone/text you are saying that the caller is more important.”

— Jayce O'Neal

“And no you're not that important that you must always dismiss your current company to answer whomever is on the phone. Seriously, you're not.”

— Jayce O'Neal

“You wonder why I don't
answer your 3 a.m. phone calls.
When you say "I miss you",
I begin to undress myself out of habit.”

— Sierra DeMulder

“When you're reading a good noir, the shocks and twists have a way of feeling deja vu-like, as if you saw them coming, but hoped the characters would take a left turn ... not answer the phone, not sleep with that woman, not sell drugs to those cops ... but knew they would. It would have been wrong if they didn't, and the real surprise can be that you care about someone you know is in for hell. You relate to them, even when their hell is so much bigger than your own. But we're all going to die, and we all make mistakes.
The best noir stories make you forget plot entirely by giving you characters that feel so well-realised you can't look away as they fall.”

— Ed Brubaker

“In case you're not bright enough to figure it out, there's a real upside to having a sinner like me answer your phone. I lie, and your conscience stays clear.”

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

“What's not so great is that all this technology is destroying our social skills. Not only have we given up on writing letters to each other, we barely even talk to each other. People have become so accustomed to texting that they're actually startled when the phone rings. It's like we suddenly all have Batphones. If it rings, there must be danger.
Now we answer, "What happened? Is someone tied up in the old sawmill?"
"No, it's Becky. I just called to say hi."
"Well you scared me half to death. You can't just pick up the phone and try to talk to me like that. Don't the tips of your fingers work?”

— Ellen DeGeneres

“Asking the head I have now to explain its own thinking is as pointless as dialing your own telephone number on your own telephone: Either way, you get an engaged signal. Or your own answer message, if you have that kind of phone system.”

— Nick Hornby

“Remember those reserves I mentioned? Time to call them up. I pick up the phone and dial. A soothing greets me after the second ring. The perfect combination of strength and comfort, and I answer back. "Hi, Mom." You thought I was calling someone else, didn't you? Deep down-I'm a momma's boy. I'm man enough to admit it. 'And trust me, I'm not the only one. Explains a lot, doesn't it? That's the reason your boyfriend can't manage to get his socks or underwear actually in the hamper-because he grew up with mommy doing it for him.”

— Emma Chase

“Hey, Reece."
There was nothing but silence for a while and I waited.
Then Reece said, "Expected it to happen eventually, darlin', but didn't expect it to hit me that hard the first time I heard a man answer your phone.”

— Kristen Ashley

“If you are sad, ask yourself why you are sad. Then pick up the phone and call someone and tell him the answer to the question. If you don't know anyone, call the operator and tell him. Most people don't know that the operator has to listen, it is a law. Also, the postman is not allowed to go inside your house, but you can talk to him on public property for up to four minutes or until he wants to go, whichever comes first.”

— Miranda July

“Keep getting asked by letter and on the street by Jane and John Does dressed in spandex how they can prepare simple "gourmet" dinners in ten minutes so as to prolong, presumably, their cross-training and spritzer-drinking binges, massage and colonic appointments, drumming and marriage-counseling sessions, and tarot-card swap clubs. An easy answer here. Scoop ample quantities of Skippy on two paper plates. Handcuff each other and then slam your faces down into the plates with gusto. Good for the gluteus maximus. And it will bring you together at the sink, plus you won't have to violate your space by answering the phone. Back to the”

— Jim Harrison

“The door," she said, her words muffled by my chest. She kicked my legs. We were in bed. The sun hadn't even come up yet.
I kicked her back.
"The door," she repeated, kicking me harder.
"Uhh," I moaned.
Then Ethan bellowed, "One of you asshole's get the fucking door."
"Uhh," I moaned.
"The door," she said again, kicking me harder again.
"Uhh." I kicked her back.
"Assholes, get the fucking door," Ethan yelled.
"Uhh."
And then my phone rang.
"Uhh," I answered.
"Dude." It was Jake. "Answer your fucking door."
"Uhh.”

— Jay McLean

“Sometimes we're at hotels, and I'll answer the phone. They'll say, 'Mr. Ripa, your breakfast is coming upstairs.' And I'm like, Is my father-in-law here? But, obviously, I'm proud either way - Ripa or Consuelos.”

— Mark Consuelos

“Stay humble. Always answer your phone - no matter who else is in the car.”

— Jack Lemmon

“Whereas God, for reasons of His own, sometimes chooses to let the machine answer. The Supreme Being is unavailable to come to the phone at this time, but He wants you to know what your call is important to Him. In the meantime, for sins of pride, press one. For avarice, press two ...”

— Richard Russo

“You ever notice if you call someones cell phone they won't answer but if you text them seconds later they will. The Power of your Thumbs compels You!”

— Stanley Victor Paskavich

“The telephone is there for your convenience, not for the convenience of your callers. Yet, as soon as we hear the phone ring, we act as if we are firefighters rushing to a five-alarm fire. We run to pick it up as if our lives depended on the call being answered at once. I have seen people interrupt quiet family dinners, dedicated reading times and meditation periods to answer”

— Robin S. Sharma

“As soon as television became the only secondary way in which films were watched, films had to adhere to a pretty linear system, whereby you can drift off for ten minutes and go and answer the phone and not really lose your place.”

— Christopher Nolan

“The iPhone will maybe become more of a video-conferencing experience - you pick up your phone, you answer it, you'll be talking to someone looking at their face.”

— Chad Hurley

“You know your problem, Quentin? You keep expecting people not to be themselves. I mean, I could hate you for being massively unpunctual and for never being interested in anything other than Margo Roth Spiegelman, and for, like, never asking me about how it's going with my girlfriend - but I don't give a shit, man, because you're you. My parents have a shit ton of black Santas, but that's okay. They're them. I'm too obsessed with a reference website to answer my phone sometimes when my friends call, or my girlfriend. That's okay, too. That's me. You like me anyway. And I like you. You're funny, and you're smart, and you may show up late, but you always show up eventually.”

— John Green

“Getting back to the issue of the child," Tina said, harshing our buzz as visual, "I really think you should reconsider. He-"
The phone rang. She picked it up, glanced at the caller ID.
"We're kind of busy," I said, a little sharply. The phone was a whole thing between Tina and me.
"But-"
"If it's important, they'll call back."
"But it's your mother."
I practically snarled. The phone, the fucking phone! People used it the way they used to use the cat-o'-nine-tails. You had to drop everything and answer the fucking thing. And God help you if you were home and, for whatever reason, didn't answer. "But I called!" Yeah, it was convenient for you so you called. But I'm in the shit because it wasn't convenient for me to drop everything and talk to you, on the spot, for whatever you needed to talk about.”

— MaryJanice Davidson

“A cell phone rings. I can feel the vibration through Brittany's pants.
"It's hers," I say.
"Answer it," Isa Instructs.
I already feel like I've kidnapped the girl. Now I'm gonna answer her cell? Shit. Rolling her a bit, I feel for the bulge in her back pocket.
"Contesta," Isa whispers loudly, this time in Spanish.
"I am," I hiss, my fingers clumsy as I fumble for the phone.
"I'll do it," Paco says, leaning over the seats and reaching toward Brittany's ass.
I whack his hand away. "Get your hands off her."
"Geez, man, I was just tryin' to help."
My response is a glare.”

— Simone Elkeles

“You are playing cards with three Jeffs. One is your father, one is your
brother, and the other is your current boyfriend. All of them have seen
you naked and heard you talking in your sleep. Your boyfriend Jeff gets
up to answer the phone. To them he is a mirror, but to you he is a room.”

— Richard Siken

“What is more natural than that a solidity, a complicity, a bond should be established between Reader and Reader, thanks to the book?
You can leave the bookshop content, you, a man who thought that the period where you could still expect something from life had ended. You are bearing with you two different expectations, and both promise days of pleasant hopes; the expectation contained in the book - of a reading experience you are impatient to resume - and the expectation contained in that telephone number - of hearing again the vibrations, a times treble and at times smoldering, of that voice, when it will answer your first phone call in a while, in fact tomorrow, with the fragile pretext of the book, to ask her if she likes it or not, to tell her how many pages you have read or not read, to suggest to her that you meet again ...”

— Italo Calvino

“Karma can be an ill-timed mistress who always calls when your Mother-in-law is the first to answer the phone ... . and it would be a completely sad story had it not been so surreally hilarious.”

— Josh Stern

“If you want to be a little bit solitary and work very hard, you can do it more easily in New York than in a town like Paris or London. Because you depend so much for human relationships here on the phone. If you don't answer your phone, you are quite a lonely couple.”

— Arman

“The greatest sex toy ever invented may be the telephone. Sometimes there's nothing more erotic than a disembodied voice, no question more tantalizing than a whispered 'What are you wearing?' Especially when you can make up the answer. On the phone your hair always looks great, your legs are always shaved, your worst pair of underwear becomes a silk negligee.”

— Meghan Daum

“Answer your phone. Get call forwarding. Or an answering service. Hire staff if you need to. But make sure that someone is picking up the phone when someone calls your business.”

— Susan Ward

“Marketing is the way your people answer the phone, the typesetting on your bills and your return policy.”

— Seth Godin

“I don't like the fact that no one has any imagination anymore. It doesn't pay to be a dreamer because all they really want you to do is answer the phone. Nobody wants you to think about anything new or use your brain or make anything interesting because everything important has already been made. America is over; it's done being brilliant.Everything genius has already been built, like all the great works of art have already been produced.”

— Joe Meno