Louis C.K. Quotes

Enjoy the top 287 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Louis C.K..

Louis C.K. Quotes

I love being white. Seriously, I really do. If youre not white, your missing out. Cuz this shit is thoroughly good. Let me clear this up by the way: Im not saying white people are better. Im saying that BEING white is clearly better. Who could even argue? If it was an option I would re-up every year! Oh yeah, Ill take white again. Absolutely. Heres how great it is to be white: if I would have a time machine I could go to any time and it would be awesome when I get there! That is exclusively a white privilege! Black people cant fuck with time machines! .
— Louis C.K. —

I love being white. Seriously, I really do. If you're not white, your missing out. 'Cuz this shit is thoroughly good. Let me clear this up by the way: I'm not saying white people are better. I'm saying that BEING white is clearly better. Who could even argue? If it was an option I would re-up every year! 'Oh yeah, I'll take white again. Absolutely.' Here's how great it is to be white: if I would have a time machine I could go to any time and it would be awesome when I get there! That is exclusively a white privilege! Black people can't fuck with time machines! .

— Louis C.K.

Why am I angry? Every morning, I wake up, I open my eyes, remember who and what I am and I say, "Yuck." Then I go about my day, and when it's over, I get back in bed, put a sheet between my sweaty legs and, as I drift off, looking back on a day of being this shitbag of a human, I mutter to myself, "Jesus Christ.

— Louis C.K.

Cars and cameras are the two things I let myself be materialistic about. I don't care about other stuff.

— Louis C.K.

It's hard having kids because it's boring ... It's just being with them on the floor while they be children. They read Clifford the Big Red Dog to you at a rate of 50 minutes a page, and you have to sit there and be horribly proud and bored at the same time.

— Louis C.K.

The part that's difficult is being single, at 41, after 10 years of marriage and two kids. That's like having a bunch of money in a currency of a country that doesn't exist anymore.

— Louis C.K.

If you do something and people think you're stupid, just go for crazy. You get more respect that way because nobody likes stupid people.

— Louis C.K.

When I see two guys kissing, I'm like, how come I can't kiss one of those guys? They look like they're having a good time.

— Louis C.K.

Apple embodies a lot of what have been defined as feminine traits: an emphasis on intuitive design, intellect, a strong sense of creativity, and that striving to always make the greatest version of something.

— Louis C.K.

Louis C.K. Quotes Pictures

Want to see more pictures of Louis C.K. quotes? Click on image of Louis C.K. quotes to view full size.

Louis C.K. Quotes Pictures 1
Louis C.K. Quotes Pictures 2
Louis C.K. Quotes Pictures 3
Louis C.K. Quotes Pictures 4