Emma Chase Quotes

“She talks like you. It's not every day you hear a four-year-old say Prince Charming is a douchebag who's only holding Cinderella back."
"That's my girl.”

— Emma Chase

“Vaginas beat penises every time.
They're like kryptonite.
Penises are defenseless against them.”

— Emma Chase

How many wives have told their husbands, "I'm fine," when they really mean, "I want to cut your balls off with a butcher knife"? How many men have told their girlfriends, "You look fine," when they really mean, "You need to go back to the gym and work out-a lot." It's the universal way of saying we're just peachy-when we're really anything but.

— Emma Chase

“No, I haven't fucked her. Not that I wouldn't love to. Trust me, if she didn't work for me, I'd hit that harder than Mohammed Ali.”

— Emma Chase

“Why do women always do this? Why are they so eager to blame themselves when someone treats them like sh*t? A guy would take a cheese grater to his tongue before admitting he screwed up.”

— Emma Chase

“I've gone cold turkey. Completely. I haven't even jerked off. Not once. In nine frigging days. I think the buildup of semen is starting to affect my brain. Like sugar to a diabetic.”

— Emma Chase

Delores is a gorgeous name, for a gorgeous girl. Plus, it rhymes with clitoris ... and I really know my way around them. Big fan.

— Emma Chase

And another thing-I've heard my sister and her little friends have their chats too. Some of the things that came out of their mouths could've made Larry fucking Flynt blush. So don't act like women don't talk just as much as us guys do ... because I know for a fact they do.

— Emma Chase

He yells, "I want any part of you that you're willing to give me!"
We both fall quiet. Breathing hard. Staring each other down.
And his voice drops low. Defeated. "I'll take anything, Kate.
Just ... don't tell me it's over. I won't accept that.

— Emma Chase

Where's a stray bullet from a random drive-by shooting when you need one?

— Emma Chase

“THE RIDE TO MY APARTMENT is an exercise in stunt driving. Trying desperately to keep my mouth on
Kate and not get us killed. She sits on my lap straddling my waist, kissing my neck, tonguing my ear
driving me out of my frigging mind. I've got one hand on the steering wheel and the other wedged
between us, gliding over her stomach, her neck, and those perfect breasts that tease me through her
half-open shirt.
Do not try this at home, kids.”

— Emma Chase

I stare at the television as Belle bends over to feed a bird. Then I lean forward, hoping for a nice cleavage shot ...
I'm going to hell, aren't I?
I can't help it. I'm desperate. Frustrated.
Horny

— Emma Chase

“She'll never forget this. She'll always remember ... me. Maybe that's chauvinistic and egotistical, but it's the truth. Up and down, over and over, I lick her from end to end.”

— Emma Chase

“Somewhere along the line, she's become more to me than just a set of legs I want to crawl between.”

— Emma Chase

“I tell them how it is, give them a good time and then the cab fare home. Thank you, good night. Don't call me, 'cause I sure as shit won't be calling you.”

— Emma Chase

“Sex is a release. Purely physical. That's all. At least to men it is.
Okay, okay-calm down-don't start throwing shoes at me or something.
At least to this man it is. Better?”

— Emma Chase

“Self-doubts are like weeds; if you don't deal with them right away, they multiply. And before you know it, your garden looks like a jungle in Vietnam.”

— Emma Chase

“Before we get into that, there's something I want to do first."
There's amusement in her voice as she asks, "What do you want to do, Drew?"
I pick her up, sweep everything off my desk, and lay her down.
"You.”

— Emma Chase

“The racket reverberates down the second staircase and spills out into the kitchen, and the two screeching, running kids who are making it do laps around the island like a fucked-up Hunger Games version of ring-around-the-rosy.”

— Emma Chase

There's two of him?"
Chelsea grins. "If that's your way of asking if Rory has a twin, then the answer is yes."
"I see you've met my brother," the boy says, apparently used to this reaction. "Don't judge me just because we share the same DNA. You've heard the term 'evil genius'?"
"Yeah."
"Rory's the evil. I'm the genius.

— Emma Chase

“I AM ALL ABOUT SELF-DETERMINATION. Will. Control. I determine my path in life. I decide my failures and successes. Screw fate. Destiny can kiss my ass. If I want something badly enough, I can have it. If I focus, sacrifice, there is nothing I can't do.”

— Emma Chase

“I mentally shake myself. I haven't gotten a spontaneous hard-on since I was twelve. What's up with that? Looks like I'm going to have to call that hottie who slipped me her number in the coffeehouse this morning.”

— Emma Chase

“From inside, I hear Sister Beatrice's voice: Did Andrew leave already? Such a sweet boy he is. And devoted too, when he sets his heart to a task. Let me tell you about the time he weeded the convent's garden. It's a long story, but we 'ave all afternoon. There was a scuffle in the lunch room, you see ...”

— Emma Chase

“There are only a few reasons why Delores Warren would want to talk to me at this point in my life. None of them are pleasant.
I motion toward my office. "Come on in."
This is how it must feel to invite a vampire into your house.”

— Emma Chase

In third grade I thought I loved her - by sixth grade, I was sure of it

— Emma Chase

I expect my sister to be compassionate about my heart ache. Gentle. Sympathetic.
What i get is, "you're a goddamn idiot, you know that, Drew?"
I bat you were starting to wonder why we call her The Bitch. Well, here you go.

— Emma Chase

“Even just the thought her ... God. I may end up being
the first man in history capable of masturbating without touching himself.
Look, Mom-no hands.”

— Emma Chase

“Forgiveness is selfish. We give it not because it's earned, but because it's what we need. To find peace. To be whole.”

— Emma Chase

What if the reason I've never let myself fall in love with a woman is because I didn't have anything to give? Because I'd already given my heart to her when we were seventeen years old? And all these years ... I've just been waiting for her to come back to me with it.

— Emma Chase

“Not that I have anything against dancing. Some guys will tell you it's effeminate but I'm not one of them. Today's dancing is practically sex with your clothes on, dry humping in a room full of people. And I'm definitely into that.”

— Emma Chase

“It doesn't count as a lie if the person you're lying to knows it's a lie.”

— Emma Chase

“Yelling is a sign of desperation, an indication that you're out of options, with nothing behind your back but volume.”

— Emma Chase

“How would you react if it was her walking into the lion's den?"
Jake's voice is low and lethally calm. "Chelsea can walk into any damn den she wants. Because I am the lion. And I'd make sure I was with her.”

— Emma Chase

“The ride is the only thing that makes the fall worth it.”

— Emma Chase

Billy, honey, could you get me another drink from the bar? I'm almost done with this one. Kate
pulls on his arm, cutting off what I'm sure would have been a brilliant retort.
Are you feeling the sarcasm?

— Emma Chase

“I'm not the kind of guy who rides the same roller-coaster twice. Once is enough,and then the thrill is gone and so is the interest.”

— Emma Chase

I don't want her thinking about the baby right now, but I can't pass by the hump without paying it homage. My lips press against it once, reverently.

— Emma Chase

Once again, to the ladies out there-here's a fact for you: Men pretty much have sex on the brain twenty-four-seven. The exact figure is like every 5.2 seconds or some shit like that.

— Emma Chase

“See this ring? It means I belong to him. And the tattoo of my name on his arm means he belongs to me. All of him. His dick is a compass, and I'm due north- it only points to me.”

— Emma Chase

“I have money. I have properties I didn't buy, cars and carpets, antiques and jewels-and none of them means a damn to me if I don't have her. So-give me a number.”

— Emma Chase

“You know my daughter, Presley?"
He nods. "Sure. Cute kid, hot mom. Unfortunate name.”

— Emma Chase

“Then Drew Evans strolls into my room. Drew is like no one I've ever known. It's as if there's a spotlight on him that never dims-he demands your notice.”

— Emma Chase

“Here's an interesting fact: how you eat a gingerbread man says a lot about your personality. Head-first eaters are ambitious, independent, and magnetic. Feet-first are the more artistic, creative types, and those who start with the hands are kind and nurturing. Same rules apply to chocolate Easter bunnies.”

— Emma Chase

I was the youngest in my family, and the only daughter, they were highly protective. But instead of restricting me, that protective instinct drove my parents to make sure I was capable and prepared for whatever life may throw at me.
Opportunities, my father would say, have to be seized with both hands, because you never know if they'll come again.

— Emma Chase

“She was my first crush. The first woman I ever masturbated about. My first Mrs. Robinson-like, older-woman fantasy. Sister Mary Beatrice Dugan. Yep, you heard me right - she's a nun. But not just any nun, kiddies. Sister Beatrice was a NILF. I don't need to spell that one our for you, do I?”

— Emma Chase

“This is ... beautiful, Brent. Thank you."
"That smile is all the thanks I need.”

— Emma Chase

“I don't stand a chance When you look at me that way I'll do anything you want me to Anything for you And I'll shout it for the whole world to know Oh, honey, that's what you do to me And I don't mind at all”

— Emma Chase

“You know I'm not a girl who cares to see Or gives a damn what anyone thinks of me I go down hard, I stand my ground But whenever you come around I'm helpless Baby, I don't stand a chance”

— Emma Chase

Anyone worth doing, is worth doing well.

— Emma Chase

“Brent and I are ... friends.
And fuck me, the benefits are fantastic”

— Emma Chase