Amber Dermont Quotes

“That's what Cal would tell you about me. "Jason's the nice one," he'd say. "He'd give you all his stars.”

— Amber Dermont

I used to believe having a good memory meant being able to remember everything in perfect detail. Now I believe having a good memory means being able to selectively forget. It's not what I'll remember, Jason," he said. "It's what I'll forget that matters.

— Amber Dermont

“You know, I'm going to make it a point whenever I see you to be like the ocean. You can look to me for relief.”

— Amber Dermont

“We should make up our own phrase," I suggested. "Add our own contribution to nautical lore."
Cal thought about it for a while and then said, "How about, the starboard sea?"
"What?" I asked. "Like the sea on the right side of the boat? That doesn't mean anything."
"No," Cal insisted, "it means the right sea, the true sea, or like finding the best path in life. It's deep. I'm telling you, it's going to catch on. By this time next year, everyone will be using it.”

— Amber Dermont

“It's how we know we're alive," ginger said. "We grieve the dead.”

— Amber Dermont

“I slept well that night because someone had been kind to me.”

— Amber Dermont

“I'd used the word "beautiful" to describe another boy. I knew how it must have sounded to her. I also knew that it was exactly what I'd meant, exactly what I did not want to mean.”

— Amber Dermont

To be with someone who is stronger than you. To have him relinquish his strength.

— Amber Dermont

“My scalp tingled like Christmas candy on a cold tongue.”

— Amber Dermont

“Don't you miss it?" I'd ask Aidan. "All that Hollywood sunshine?"
"It's like hating the color yellow," she'd say, "and living in a golden age.”

— Amber Dermont

“In a moment like this, there were so many beautiful and uncommon things worth saying. Aidan would have said them all, stealing this spectacle from the men who'd paid for it, making it her own.”

— Amber Dermont

“Up until that point, I'd thought that whatever existed between Cal and me was separate and distinct from the rest of the world. It hadn't occurred to me that a stranger could sense and recognize something so private.”

— Amber Dermont

For some parents, having children meant full absolution from any future mistakes. My father wouldn't permit himself to be wrong. He shifted the blame of misplaced scissors, rising interest rates, and iceless ice cube trays all unto Riegel and me.

— Amber Dermont

“Everyone at Bellingham would know me, know who I was, by dinner. Would they consider me the hero or the fuckup? All I had wanted was to be anonymous.”

— Amber Dermont

Bellingham Academy: everything you always wanted in a prep school and less.

— Amber Dermont

“I'd like to be a light meter."
"A what?"
"A light meter. Like a photographer uses. Tinks had one this morning." Aidan snapped an imaginary photo of me. "I'd like to be able to measure and know for certain whether people were giving off light or taking light away."
"You're strange," I said. "But I think I like that about you.”

— Amber Dermont

“I rushed off to Whitehall and assumed Aidan would head back to Astor. But when I turned around briefly, I saw Aidan uncoiling her black scarf from around her neck. She held each end of the scarf above her head, the silk capturing the wind, arching above her like a parachute. Aidan released one end, kiting the scarf. The wind swirled around her for a moment before Aidan let go completely. She was an excellent student. The light silk caught a thermal and rose, sailing above the water. A dark black bird against the blue sky.”

— Amber Dermont

Boredom is actually the most plentiful substance in the universe.

— Amber Dermont

“I'd thought of her with unblinking eyes, moving always, across the pages of opened books with rapid precision, but as she stood in front of me, her eyes looked slow and watery. I capsized into them.”

— Amber Dermont

I was surprised," I said, "to find someone here with you. I'd rather you existed only when I was around.

— Amber Dermont

“How strange and rare it was to see the top of a girl's ear. I reached out to touch her, but my hand flew back from a spark of static electricity.”

— Amber Dermont

“When you've done something terrible, something you regret, it gives you this special insight, like you can detect other people's bad behavior.”

— Amber Dermont

“Aidan had compared Bellingham to the Island of Misfit Toys, a sanctuary for the unwanted. But the problem, as I saw it, was that putting this many defective kids together only created more trouble.”

— Amber Dermont

I don't know why I said what I did. Maybe I wanted Hannah to remember something, or maybe I wanted to test her, but when she asked me my name I didn't even pause. "My name is Aidan," I said. "It means fire.

— Amber Dermont

“Jason, as much as I'd like to believe that we're friends, I know I can't count on you.”

— Amber Dermont

“It was scary having that sort of power over a girl. You could hurt her in ways you might never understand.”

— Amber Dermont

Even in all that darkness I could see her beauty. Still, I couldn't claim it for myself. Instead, I decided to hurt her.
"You loved someone," I said, "who was completely inappropriate.

— Amber Dermont

It's a silly thing, but I like to understand people through their obsessions.

— Amber Dermont