True Story Bro Quotes

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True Story Bro Quotes

Jesus waited three days to come back to life. It was perfect! If he had only waited one day, a lot of people wouldnt have even heard he died. Theyd be all, "Hey Jesus, what up?" and Jesus would probably be like, "What up? I died yesterday!" and theyd be all, "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude ... " and then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected, and how it was a miracle, and the duded be like "Uhh okay, whatever you say, bro ... " And hes not gonna come back on a Saturday. Everybodys busy, doing chores, workin the loom, trimmin the beard, NO. He waited the perfect number of days, three. Plus its Sunday, so everyones in church already, and theyre all in there like "Oh no, Jesus is dead", and then BAM! He bursts in the back door, runnin up the aisle, everyones totally psyched, and FYI, thats when he invented the high five. Thats why we wait three days to call a woman, because thats how long Jesus wants us to wait ... True story.
— Barney Stinson —

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