Quotes About Baldness

“Megan had accustomed herself to receiving the third degree about her dates.
His name is Dillon Carver.He's the same age as me, and also a senior. He has no family history of insanity or premature baldness. He doesn't smoke, drink or do drugs, but he does have a vicious Dr Pepper habit. I'll let you know how big his penis is after the dance.”

— Sara Bell

“We all of us must come to terms with what and who we are, and recognize that this wisdom is not going to earn us any praise, that life is not going to pin a medal on us for recognizing and enduring our own vanity or egoism or baldness or our potbelly.”

— Sandor Marai

“There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.”

— Don Herold

“I adore good food as I adore all the other pleasant things of life, and because I have that gift I am able to look upon the future with equanimity."
"Why?" asked Alec.
"Because a love for good food is the only thing that remains with man when he grows old. Love? What is love when you are five and fifty and can no longer hide the disgraceful baldness of your pate. Ambition? What is ambition when you have discovered that honours are to the pushing and glory to the vulgar. Finally we must all reach an age when every passion seems vain, every desire not worth the trouble of achieving it; but then there still remain to the man with a good appetite three pleasures each day, his breakfast, his luncheon, and his dinner.”

— W. Somerset Maugham

“He was miles past middle age with a gut that housed ample good meals. A patch of silver hair formed a trail from his forehead to the crown of his head where it dead ended with male pattern baldness. A sea of family photos took up residence on his desk. He sat back in a high-back leather swivel chair. Steepled hands. Robert Last Boots in Cognac Cordovan. Blue collar city worker with prestigious white collar dreams.”

— Brandi L. Bates

“Even baldness becomes a beauty of a hairless head through the heart of acceptance”

— Munia Khan

“Recently he has noticed idiocy creeping up on him. His resolve to keep his head on straight, his feet on the ground, is failing and he has observed, quite objectively, that he is becoming more thoughtless, selfish, making more and more stupid remarks. He has tried to do something about this but it almost feels out of his control now, like pattern baldness. Why not just give in and be an idiot? Stop caring.”

— David Nicholls

“Bald as the bare mountain tops are bald, with a baldness full of grandeur.”

— Matthew Arnold

“Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.”

— Johnny Vegas

“This movie is a toupee made up to look like honest baldness.”

— Pauline Kael

“But the shrieking went on and on, primal, almost glad-this protest was righteous. I couldn't make up my mind whether the baby was male or female; the only certainties were near baldness and incandescent rage. The kid didn't like its blanket, or its rattle, or the lap it was sat on, or the world . . . the time had come to demand quality.”

— Helen Oyeyemi

“The bellboy that showed me to the room was this very old guy around sixty-five. He was even more depressing than the room was. He was one of those bald guys that comb all their hair over from the side to cover up the baldness. I'd rather be bald than do that. Anyway, what a gorgeous job for a guy around sixty-five years old. Carrying people's suitcases and waiting for a tip.”

— J.D. Salinger

“It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness.”

— Marcus Tullius Cicero

“And the sins of the Eastern father shall be visited upon the Western sons. Often taking their time, stored up in the genes like baldness or testicular carcinoma, but sometimes on the very same day.”

— Zadie Smith

“It was another thing you didn't learn at a top-drawer school. Bickering is like baldness or lousy gifts. It runs in families.”

— Lemony Snicket

“There is more felicity on the far side of baldness than young men can possibly imagine.”

— Logan Pearsall Smith

“He took a trip ... up to ... Elliott's house, his mansion rather. Awful place, twelve bedrooms and swimming pool and media hall and five car garage, but cheap and shoddy all the same, like the one next door and next door to that. A row of Ikea houses, such wealthy mediocrity. His very own son. His big, bald son. Who could believe it. The bigness, the baldness, the stupidity. In a house designed to bore the daylight out of visitors, no character at all, all blonde wood and fluorescent lighting and clean white machinery.
Not to mention his brand new wife, number three, a clean white machine herself. Up from the cookie cutter and into Elliott's life, she might as well have jumped out of the microwave, her skin orange, her teeth pearly white. A trophy wife. But why the word "trophy"? Something to shoot on a safari.”

— Colum McCann

“With his eyes squinted to slits, Donny reminds me of Clint Eastwood, if Clint Eastwood were eight inches shorter, thirty pounds heavier, less good-looking, with male-pattern baldness, and badly scarred.”

— Dean Koontz

“When the New York Times scratches its head, get ready for total baldness as you tear out your hair.”

— Christopher Hitchens

“Even baldness, when it is only baldness over the forehead (as in his case), is rather becoming than not in a man, for it heightens the head and adds to the intelligence of the face.”

— Wilkie Collins

“Until woman as she is can drive this plastic spectre out of her own and her man's imagination she will continue to apologize and disguise herself, while accepting her male's pot-belly, wattles, bad breath, farting, stubble, baldness and other ugliness without complaint.”

— Germaine Greer

“You can inherit male-pattern baldness from your mother's father, but not a tendency to fight in the First World War.”

— Jeremy Hardy

“Baldness that appears to be normal is a disease in Europe, almost all of them are bald, and that is because of the things they eat; while among the indigenous peoples there are no bald people, because we eat other things”

— Evo Morales

“The worst thing baldness causes is loneliness.”

— Gail Porter

“Intolerance is the 'Do Not Touch' sign on something that cannot bear touching. We do not mind having our hair ruffled, but we will not tolerate any familiarity with the toupee which covers our baldness.”

— Eric Hoffer

“Women smirk at baldness. How adorable would they find it if they began to lose their breasts in their late twenties? If both tits just shrunk up - unevenly I might add - and eventually turned into wine-cork nubs. Then it would be a different story. Then men would get the pity that they deserve. As far as I'm concerned, baldness is the male breast cancer only worse, because almost everyone gets it. True, it's not life threatening. Just social-life threatening. But in New York City, there is no difference.”

— Augusten Burroughs

“According to the doctors, I'm only suffering from a light form of premature baldness.”

— Federico Fellini

“I thought the Egyptians had cured baldness.”

— Greg Proops

“It is foolish to pluck out one's hair for sorrow, as if grief could be assuaged by baldness.
[Lat., Stultum est in luctu capillum sibi evellere, quasi calvito maeror levaretur.]”

— Marcus Tullius Cicero