Martini Quotes

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Martini Quotes

Have you seen the bologna that has the olives in it? Whos that for? I like my bologna like a martini. With an olive. Ill have the bologna sandwich - dirty.
— Jim Gaffigan —

I was sent to a school with bosses for teachers- no Twain, only cane; check your dick you harry, no Dickens either, No Tom Sawyers no David Copperfields only Webster, master it for grammar, the Wren with a dash of Martini-Drink deep.

— Aporva Kala

One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.

— James Thurber

I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host.

— Dorothy Parker

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

— Robert Benchley

I love bookstores and booksellers. In my novel 'Dirty Martini,' I thanked over 3,000 booksellers by name in the back matter.

— J.A. Konrath

He was white and shaken, like a dry martini.

— P.G. Wodehouse

It was always fun to skate with Paul Wylie and Paul Martini.

— Nancy Kerrigan

Bond went into the lobby bar to gather his thoughts and ordered a vodka martini, explaining to the barman the best way to achieve the effect of vermouth without diluting the vodka too much. Ice in the shaker, add a slurp of vermouth, pour out the vermouth, add the vodka, shake well, strain into a chilled glass, add a slice of lemon peel, no pith.

— William Boyd

Let's see, the last guy I dated-is there a word for someone who's sexually attracted to Muppets? Andrea's elegant persona was destroyed as she laughed so hard martini shot out of her nose.

— Molly Harper

I thought you weren't going to ever talk about it."
"How can I help it?"
"You'll lose it if you talk about it."
"I just talk around it. You know I feel rather damned good, Jake."
"You should."
"You know it makes one feel rather good deciding not to be a bitch."
"Yes."
"It's sort of what we have instead of God."
"Some people have God", I said. "Quite a lot."
"He never worked very well with me."
"Should we have another Martini?

— Ernest Hemingway

Robert Johnson invented the blues, at midnight, at a crossroads, after selling his soul to the devil. Dorothy Parker invented amusing women, at 2 p.m., in New York's best cocktail bar, after tipping a busboy 50 cents for a martini. It's hard not to draw conclusions as to which is the brighter sex.

— Caitlin Moran

This is an excellent martini-sort of tastes like it isn't there at all, just a cold cloud.

— Herman Wouk

My chosen drink would be a Southern Comfort, lime and lemonade, a dry martini or a good red wine.

— Nikki Sanderson

Apparently President Obama's favorite cocktail is a martini. When asked how he likes it, he said, 'On the beach, in Hawaii, in 2017.'

— Jimmy Fallon

We have lived through the era when happiness was a warm puppy, and the era when happiness was a dry martini, and now we have come to the era when happiness is 'knowing what your uterus looks like'.

— Nora Ephron

Some of the biggest bores I've ever known are men who have been highly successful in business, particularly self-made heads of big companies. Before the first olive has settled into the first martini, they pour the stories of their lives into the nearest and sometimes the remotest ears capturable ... These men have indeed paid the price of success. To rise to the top of a big company often takes a totality of effort, concentration and dedication. Others, too, have to pay part of the price. Wife and children are out of mind even when in sight ...

— Malcolm Forbes

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