Anaïs Nin Quotes: Am I Pushing Or Dying The Light Up There

Am I Pushing Or Dying? The Light Up There, The Immense Round Blazing White Light Is Drinking Me. It Drinks Me Slowly, Inspires Me Into Space. If I Do Not Close My Eyes, It Will Drink All Of Me. I Seep Upward, In Long Icy Threads, Too Light, And Yet Inside Me There Is A Fire Too, The Nerves Are Twisted, There Is No Rest From This Long Tunnel Dragging Me, Or Am I Pushing Myself Out Of The Tunnel, Or Is The Child Being Pushed Out Of Me, Or Is The Light Drinking Me. Am I Dying? The Ice In The Veins, The Cracking Of The Bones, This Pushing In Darkness, With A Small Shaft Of Light In The Eyes Like The Edge Of The Knife, The Feeling Of A Knife Cutting The Flesh, The Flesh Somewhere Is Tearing As If It Were Burned Through By A Flame, Somewhere My Flesh Is Tearing And The Blood Is Spilling Out. I Am Pushing In The Darkness, In Utter Darkness.
— Anaïs Nin —

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