Lemony Snicket Quotes

Enjoy the top 763 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Lemony Snicket.

Lemony Snicket Quotes

Taking ones chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.
— Lemony Snicket —

Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night's sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else up, so that they can feel this way, too.

— Lemony Snicket

Taking one's chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.

— Lemony Snicket

Stealing, of course, is a crime, and a very impolite thing to do. But like most impolite things, it is excusable under certain circumstances. Stealing is not excusable if, for instance, you are in a museum and you decide that a certain painting would look better in your house, and you simply grab the painting and take it there. But if you were very, very hungry, and you had no way of obtaining money, it would be excusable to grab the painting, take it to your house, and eat it.

— Lemony Snicket

Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something

— Lemony Snicket

You would run much slower if you were dragging something behind you, like a knapsack or a sheriff.

— Lemony Snicket

Nobody wants to hear that you will try your best. It is the wrong thing to say. It is like saying 'I probably won't hit you with a shovel.' Suddenly everyone is afraid you will do the opposite.

— Lemony Snicket

For Beatrice, when we met, my life began. Soon afterwards, yours ended.

— Lemony Snicket

You might be afraid of the dark, but the dark is not afraid of you. That's why the dark is always close by.

— Lemony Snicket

It is a lonely feeling when someone you care about becomes a stranger.

— Lemony Snicket

Hal is on his way. The nurse announced reentering the room.

— Lemony Snicket

Nobody can teach you how to like something. You can like it, or you can pretend to like it, in order to make someone happy.

— Lemony Snicket

The real Santa Claus is at the mall.

— Lemony Snicket

Some of the simplest things in like are the most difficult to imagine.

— Lemony Snicket

As I'm sure you know, the expression 'It's all uphill from here' has nothing to do with walking up stairs - it merely means that things will get better in the future.

— Lemony Snicket

Don't be a smart aleck," Hungry said.
"But it cheers me up," I said.

— Lemony Snicket

I'm not smart, Snicket. I don't ask the right questions and I never find the right answers.

— Lemony Snicket

Lion which was nailed to the wall to the bowl of apple cores which sat on a small wooden table.

— Lemony Snicket

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