Jonathan Ames Quotes

Enjoy the top 81 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Jonathan Ames.

Jonathan Ames Quotes

Im actually much more shy and self-conscious than peoples perception of me.
— Jonathan Ames —

I live for coincidences. They briefly give to me the illusion or the hope that there's a pattern to my life, and if there's a pattern, then maybe I'm moving toward some kind of destiny where it's all explained.

— Jonathan Ames

People don't expect too much from literature. They just want to know they're not alone with being confused.

— Jonathan Ames

I didn't think I was in a morbid mood, but it appears I am. My mind goes round and round trying to figure things out, but I always come back to the same two things: Loneliness and Death. Life ends before we figure anything out, most importantly how not to be lonely. Solitude is fine. But feeling like you have no one to love - abject lonliness - is not alright.

— Jonathan Ames

Oh, God, I don't know what's more difficult, life or the English language.

— Jonathan Ames

Unfortunately, I'm one of those idiots who knows everything about health and is in a constant state of alarm, and yet I continue to do everything I shouldn't do.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: I was aware that i was acting
I was aware that I was acting atrociously but I couldn't stop myself. Rarely had I behaved in such a manner. But I guess when we're feeling lonely in life, we attack those who actually do love us. It's one of the things that characterizes human nature and can be summed up in one word: FLAWED.

— Jonathan Ames

I know I experience great consolation when my mouth is between a woman's legs. I think it must be because I'm drinking in her happiness.

— Jonathan Ames

Insightful and heartbreaking, but also wonderfully comedic in its gutsy honesty. A beautiful and powerful memoir.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Anyway what do women grab when theyre
Anyway, what do women grab when they're nervous and sitting at their desks? Do they slip their hands inside their panties? What a distracting thought. Just the word panty is distracting. I love that word; it implies so much. I love how women look in panties, how they're flat in the front. I'm thirty-five, but sometimes it's still this beautiful amazing shock to me that women don't have penises. They just have this lovely little mound of hair and then this tucked away glorious hole. Hole. Wait. Hole sounds vulgar. Is passageway better? Pretty envelope? Georgia O'Keeffe flower? Pussy? Pussy is good. I like the word pussy. Tucked away beautiful pussy. I wish I could put my face in one right now and sing out, I love you!

— Jonathan Ames

It was another sunny day, good for skin cancer and playing tennis.

— Jonathan Ames

I wondered where the person was who had taken my place, who wanted to know what news people had been told. I'm always looking for the person who replaces me, who thinks the things I do, who fills in for me when I'm not there. I know there is someone younger than me doing what I did and someone older doing what I will do, and someone my age being just like me.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Try to think about more important things
Try to think about more important things,' he said. 'Think about your soul, your character. Think about the freezer. It's a solid block of ice. It needs defrosting. There might a steak in there. Concentrate on things like that. There could be a meal in it.

— Jonathan Ames

I do think everyone would be a lot happier if we laid eggs on our own and could just have friendship and didn't need to mount and penetrate one another.

— Jonathan Ames

I hid my underwear beneath a parked Peugeot.

— Jonathan Ames

It's not easy taking care of one's self, determining nap lengths and all that, but with two people it's a manageable job.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Its very hard not to commit cancer
It's very hard not to commit cancer suicide in America.

— Jonathan Ames

Essentially I'm a pantheist-agnostic. I worship many deities with equal amounts of confusion.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Then between sixth street and seventh
Then between Sixth Street and Seventh Street, my mood was vastly improved when I passed a good-looking dog, a dark brown Lab. We locked eyes for a moment-two lovers from a former life reunited-and I felt quite happy.

— Jonathan Ames

It's kind of like wearing a baseball cup. I want to call it the Mangina." "That's a good name for it ... Where are the other vaginas you made?" Chandler brought over to me a plastic bag and dumped out all the failed vaginas on to his drafting table.

— Jonathan Ames

A lot of writing is a form of seeing - putting down what you see in terms of action and landscape.

— Jonathan Ames

When I was in college, I had the good fortune to have Joyce Carol Oates as my writing teacher. She told me that I could take an aspect of myself, and from that one bit of personality, I can create a character. This is what I have done, particularly in my novels.

— Jonathan Ames

It's hard to leave New York: this is where my friends are, my parents are. It is so vital. The whole world seems to look to New York.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: I drink coffee without coffee i probably
I drink coffee. Without coffee, I probably couldn't write.

— Jonathan Ames

I am always the source of the worst rumors about myself.

— Jonathan Ames

I might have some sort of personality disorder. I might not have proper filters; it might be some kind of version of Asperger's meets Tourettes meets prose.

— Jonathan Ames

A lot of writers, probably because they're sensitive, which makes them want to be writers, have fears about their masculinity, so they overcompensate by having an interest in boxing and tough-guy things.

— Jonathan Ames

I grew up in northern New Jersey - the banlieue of New York - and I now live in Brooklyn. I am separated from my parents by about 50 miles, but really there is almost no distance between us. I speak to them nearly every day.

— Jonathan Ames

I don't really recognise success. I don't see myself as on an upwardly mobile trajectory. I see myself as on the edge of a cliff about to fall off.

— Jonathan Ames

I'm actually much more shy and self-conscious than people's perception of me.

— Jonathan Ames

Having a show get canceled is like, 'Oh, you have caviar between your teeth,' you know what I mean? Because you had a show in the first place.

— Jonathan Ames

I've always been inspired by Don Quixote as a role model of sorts, of the power of books to sort of make you insane in maybe a beautiful way.

— Jonathan Ames

It's hard for me to think of writing a novel, because it takes so long.

— Jonathan Ames

I promote my own self-hatred.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Something has happened where you almost
Something has happened where you almost never grow up in America. Maybe it's the greater wealth.

— Jonathan Ames

There's no shortage of material in life.

— Jonathan Ames

To write about a place, you have to live there.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: For me the past is dead cant go back
For me, the past is dead. Can't go back.

— Jonathan Ames

I am part of a vast generation of people who perpetually live as if they just graduated from college.

— Jonathan Ames

I didn't play or like a lot of board games as a child. I liked playing with my G.I. Joes and making up adventures for them.

— Jonathan Ames

I don't have ADD, but I only like to pay attention to the things I like to pay attention to, and things like getting a TV and getting the cable working are beyond me, and so I let such things lapse, sometimes for years. This applies to keeping my apartment clean.

— Jonathan Ames

I don't mind being ridiculed - well, I guess I would mind a little, but it would only last a few minutes - it's all very ephemeral; it doesn't really matter what people think of me.

— Jonathan Ames

From age 23 to 44 - I'm 45 now - I was always in need of money, and I was especially in need of it from 23 to about 34, and my great aunt would always give me money, a hundred bucks, every two months or so, and a lot of times that hundred bucks made a huge difference - I could eat or pay a small bill. It kept me going. She gave me money. It was very loving.

— Jonathan Ames

No one I interact with - except maybe for family and strangers at the Russian baths and other weird places I may go to - is just friends or lovers with me: they also know something of my writing and this distorts their take on me

— Jonathan Ames

The real self and the public self are intertwined, like a tumor around an organ, and you can't cut the tumor or you'll kill the organ, so they live together, until the tumor chokes the organ off (but which self is the tumor?). Or it's like something out of Star Trek. The Borg.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Im also not sure that i look up to
I'm also not sure that I look up to others as knowing what the hell is going on, except maybe Andre Agassi, who, when I interviewed him, while covering the U.S. Open, seemed to know what was going on. My basic assumption is that we're all confused all the time. Some people do act more confident, though. Maybe they aren't confused. I am. I'm confused.

— Jonathan Ames

I started puberty very late. I was nearly sixteen. And for complicated reasons this late arrival of my puberty caused me to stop playing competitive tennis. But before my puberty problem, I had trouble with my lower back and with my left testicle.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: After my first novel my mother said to
After my first novel, my mother said to me, 'Why don't you make your writing more funny? You're so funny in person.' Because my first novel was rather dark. And I don't know, but something about what she said was true. 'Yes, why don't I?' Maybe I was afraid to be funny in the writing. But since then, seven books later, almost everything I've done has a comedic edge to it.

— Jonathan Ames

Some ego is involved because I guess one wants to be perceived as a good clown and one puts one's name on the art; but it's so hard to do anything in life, trapped as we are in our bodies, that is purely selfless for others ... somehow the self is always involved.

— Jonathan Ames

A lot of readers have actually helped me, been really sweet to me ... So maybe my cry for help has sometimes been answered.

— Jonathan Ames

Jonathan Ames Quotes: Then again the name the associations
Then again, the name, the associations with a writer's name, can add to the reader's entertainment and pleasure.

— Jonathan Ames

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