Bill Burr Quotes

Enjoy the top 96 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Bill Burr.

Bill Burr Quotes

Im always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesnt get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about whats bugging me.
— Bill Burr —

I'm not going to lie. I am a psycho. Luckily, I get most of it out on stage.

— Bill Burr

Podcasting is great. Total freedom.

— Bill Burr

Everyone should just drive out to the Mojave Desert and just experience it, and it's a fun place to live.

— Bill Burr

There is a very difficult period in a comedian's career - it's that window of time where you're good enough to draw tickets but nobody knows you yet.

— Bill Burr

Carnegie Hall is as good as they say it is. It's not like Stonehenge which looks great in books but then you go there and it's a pile of rocks next to a highway. There's actually a highway right next to it, but you don't see that in pictures.

— Bill Burr

I've battled with that type of stuff, but what I've found is that by doing stand-up, I've actually learned about depression and how to combat it. I don't have clinical, but I've definitely had my bouts with it.

— Bill Burr

Working on the Dave Chappelle show was amazing.

— Bill Burr

Any other town you go to there's this little devil and a little angel on your shoulder. A little good advice, a little bad advice.You go to Las Vegas, there's like a devil and a devil and they're just battling it out the whole time. It's like, "Smoke some crack!" "Get a hooker!" And then I go, "YEA! Yea, this is a good town. Smoke some crack and get a hooker! Alright!

— Bill Burr

It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to. I think in the old days with the studio system the performer was a bit of an afterthought. You can be a wildcard on the internet. But if you put something on the internet once it's out there it's out there for life.

— Bill Burr

If this goes into sweatshop labor, I'm quitting this podcast.

— Bill Burr

There is no reason to hit a woman. And I was just like, really? I could give you like 17 right off the top of my head.

— Bill Burr

I was painfully shy when I was younger but at some point you've gotta grow up. I think the genius in the man-boy thing is you tap into a woman's motherly instincts.

— Bill Burr

I think the fear of humiliating yourself on stage always motivates me to give at least 90 percent. I've definitely been guilty of leaning on the mic stand, but you can only do that so long before you're like, "Jesus, I'm bombing." The fact that people pay to come see me, that's really just out the window.

— Bill Burr

As much as Metallica rocked, they always had these song names ... 'The Thing That Shouldn't Be'. 'The Chair That Wasn't There', you know?

— Bill Burr

If you try to deliver a funny line in a funny way, it comes out as wacky and you ruin the scene.

— Bill Burr

I'm trying to get away from trashing women, to be honest. I think I've done enough of that in my career.

— Bill Burr

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