Andrew Kaufman Quotes

Enjoy the top 25 famous quotes, sayings and quotations by Andrew Kaufman.

Andrew Kaufman Quotes

He knocks on doors and stands there. Youd be surprised how few doors get answered
— Andrew Kaufman —

There are two ways to get rid of an anxiety monster,my friend-you either have a bath or a nap.

— Andrew Kaufman

I don't remember a single monster before I met you.' he'd told Amphibian. 'Now they seem to be all over the place.'
'You mean there wasn't anything you were afraid of?' the Amphibian had asked him.
'lots.'
'What did they look like?'
It was a funny question.
'They didn't look like anything. They were ideas,' Tom told him. 'Like not being able to pay rent, or being lonely.'
'That's the most terrifying thing I've ever heard.' the Amphibian replied.

— Andrew Kaufman

He knocks on doors and stands there. You'd be surprised how few doors get answered

— Andrew Kaufman

Why do bad things happen to good people?'
'Because it makes a good story.

— Andrew Kaufman

Are you sad?" Nicola asked. Richard turned in the chair. The scissors became motionless.
"Yes. I am sad. I'm sad most of the time."
"Does it bother you?"
"It never used to. But now it does. Very much."
"It's because the world disappoints you," Nicola said. She set down hers scissors. "It continually fails to surprise you. It fails to be as wonderful as you long for it to be. This is where your sadness comes from.

— Andrew Kaufman

Okay, there's this thing you can do, a thing you can do like no other person on this planet. That makes you special, but being special ready doesn't mean anything. You still have to get dressed in the morning. Your shoelaces still break. Your lover will still leave you if you don't treat her right

— Andrew Kaufman

The code of a world he'd never been invited to join.

— Andrew Kaufman

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